How I was the lesbianMahinur Niyazov`s Correspondents and Mavljuda Sabitova you have tried to understand features of national lesbian love
What for, girls … little girls love?
“ Nobody understands the woman how other woman “ - the most widespread excuse of lesbians. Here in this most “ other woman “ Mavljuda Sabitova has tried to reincarnate. She is a girl opened for dialogue, that is not burdened with the significant other.
duties of Mahinur Nijazovoj included search of a secluded place where girls could spend time. No, it at all that you have thought. To spend time - means to meet and learn each other more close. Contrary to stereotypes of the lesbian not so are thoughtless, as about them speak. With the first counter in bed do not jump.
search of a passion for Sabitovoj have begun with the Internet. Early in the morning on Tuesday veb - girls of one of a dating site have come across the announcement: “ Lonely … wishes to get acquainted with the understanding and tender girl or the woman for friendship and more “.
Responses have not kept itself waiting. In the first put Sabitova thirsting dialogue has received 5 messages. All first of all interested, who this mysterious lady - fem or buch.
to Understand terminology to us has helped standard “ the Dictionary on sexology “.
- Fem is a passive lesbian, - authors of the book explain. - it, as well as any naturalka, is womanly enough, it cannot be calculated in crowd. Buch, to the contrary, always confuse to men. In a family of their duty are distributed as follows: buch earns money, does a hard work on the house. And fem nurses children, prepares, erases, cleans and etc.
Considering that to Sabitovu never in the street called: “ Bajke! “ we have decided that it nevertheless fem. This point has been urgently brought in the questionnaire. There and then became more active all buchi. Though and femok it has not upset.
- it is unimportant that both of us - fem, - writes Sabitovoj certain Nailja. - Unless we cannot be happy together?
- I married, and my husband already has bothered me, - unknown person Rita has informed in the message. - me the tender girl. I could become you the loving and understanding friend.
messages came and from a strong half of mankind. One guys offered “ to try with the muzhik and to return to normal life “. Another simply would like to look, “ as it is done by two women “.
But us girls interested only. And not to weary potential passions, Sabitova has agreed on a meeting. At the appointed o`clock the correspondent “ stood at a cafe on “ the Moscow Council “. From - for a corner the woman of years of thirty has seemed low a dense constitution. On closer examination Sabitova has noticed that it is possible to name woman Dariju (so it was presented to the vis-a-vis) hardly. Thickset figure, it is short strizhennye hair, shabby jeans and football boots - all specified that it buch.
Appointment proceeded about two hours. In this time the new acquaintance has told, how it is difficult to be the lesbian in the Asian country. In public it is necessary to hide the bents constantly.
- earlier I lived with the girlfriend, - tells Darija. - All of us said to neighbours that sisters though absolutely with it are not similar. But from people a little that you will hide. All guessed and avoided. To children did not allow to play with our son. Difficultly it is necessary us here.
the Woman has told that in Bishkek any organisation protecting interests of lesbians operates. This NPO both trainings, and consultations spends for “ ours “.
- And me there it is possible? - Has modestly asked Sabitova. “ the Girlfriend “ promised to ask co-ordinators.
Who protects lesbians
Long days of expectation did not give us rest, and we have called in the non-governmental organisation. At office to us have responded that lesbians not so comfortably feel in the presence of strangers. Therefore on training it was not possible to get to us. And parties closed, and an input there only on the invitation. It was necessary to admit that actually we correspondents and to us it is necessary to meet representatives of group. The impenetrable wall has been broken, and the voice in a tube has dictated the address.
this time to communicate with lesbians it was necessary Nijazovoj. Having armed with a dictophone, it was knocked in apartment of the house of one of southern microdistricts of capital. Towards there were Vick`s pretty girls and Anja, co-ordinators of group “ Labris “ (so this organisation) is called. Here in a small room also gather kyrgyzstanskie lesbians. Everyone visited apartment should leave “ Hand print “. On a wall about hundred silhouettes of brushes. Among signatures familiar names have been found out also.
Apparently, visit an institution of the girl of different nationalities and sexual orientations. Most of all, of course, lesbians, but there are also bisexuals, and even FtM (female - to - male are that want to change a floor).
Officially the organisation works in Bishkek since December of last year. Exists at the expense of financial support of Dutch company MaMaCash. While the group unites only lesbians of capital. To give legal support to provincial supporters of Sapfo “ Labris “ cannot.
- the purpose of our group - to unite lesbians, bi - and transsexuals, - tells Anja. - Our girls, especially provincials, differ closeness and fear before a society. Therefore especially do not advertise the bents. Though and in other countries of the lesbian are not much more more opened. All depends on the status and vital principles of the person. The society is yet ready to accepting homosexuals such what they are.
girls have conducted research among those who regularly keeps in touch with their organisation. It is more than half of lesbians yet have not reached 25 years. It speaks simply.
- the adults, already settled steams keep aloof. And our trainings and seminars basically for young, not self-assured lesbians.
in marriage nevterpezh
to Niyazov - the person not indifferent to destinies of lesbians (nevertheless the colleague too “ not such, as all “) - Has interested a question of official relations between girls. Unisex marriages, as it is known, are resolved in Holland, Canada, Belgium, Spain, some states of America. Our lesbians should be content only with a civil marriage. Our Code about a family does not allow to register the relation of lesbians officially.
- I was against marriages earlier. Considered it as something routine, - tells the story of Anja. With Vikoj they already half a year live together. - In 21 year when I had a first girlfriend, has understood all value of check in of relations. We also want to have the same, as heterosexual steams. Me simply revolts that I cannot undersign with Vikoj. Than I am worse than others?!
- the stamp in the passport will not change our relations, - tells Vick. - and it does not mean that all homosexual steams will run to be registered. Only those who is really assured of the partner. After all at geteroseksualov this right is, but not all hurry to undersign.
While Niyazov understood subtleties of the family legislation, Sabitova had not time to beat off from persevering fans. Someone even suggested it to leave and get married abroad not to injure the mentality which has not got stronger yet. It began to tyre all gradually. Niyazov and Sabitova have decided to sum up. Both, without arranging, have come to one - the lesbian in Kyrgyzstan to be not too simple. The decision to remove the questionnaire from a dating site was accepted. But the cellular telephone Sabitovoj still for a long time received esemeski from “ tender and understanding “ …
Homosexuality - an inclination to persons of the floor - is inherent both to men (uranizm), and to women (lesbijanstvo). In a society there is an opinion that all homosexuals identical. Time soft hands and affected manners, means, - the gay, a short hairstyle and a mannish figure - by all means lesbian. Meanwhile only 15 % of homosexuals - men behave effeminately.
Besides, there is a big difference between “ opening “ and “ acceptance “ own sexual orientation. Someone worries, others conceive all simply. And the third at all try to treat themselves. But only 1 from 20 homosexuals regrets for the nonconventional orientation. Lesbians get used easier. The statistics shows that about 70 % of women in unisex pair endure an orgasm, and only 2 of 5 - in heterosexual.
Every third woman has experience of lesbian sex.
94 % of all women dream on a subject of unisex love.
in Russia lesbijanstvo existed since the old days. In ancient Russia it was not considered as the big sin.
opinion of the psychologist
Keneshbek USENOV, the main psychologist of a city, the head of the Bishkek centre of the psychotherapeutic help:
- Having learnt about nonconventional orientation of the child, basically parents are anxious. It seems to them that their child not as all. I in practice had families which pressed on children. But it, as it is known, in what good does not result. As there are true lesbians who cannot even imagine sex with the man. Till now nobody can find an explanation, why they such. Someone says that this hereditary. Others are assured that genetic codes are broken. But one is known precisely - they cannot be reoriented. Now many researchers assure that this normal natural phenomenon. In each person are put both female, and man`s hormones.
Meet in our life and the taught lesbians. At teenage age or in prison of the person urge circumstances to resort to unisex communications. It can be fixed. But they can be disaccustomed.
opinion of the children`s psychotherapist
Ajgul RASULOVA, the children`s psychotherapist:
- lesbian steams are not absolutely comprehensible To education of the child. For normal development of mentality man`s force is necessary to the child also, it is necessary to distinguish a role of the father and mother in a family.
researchers assert that children in lesbian families test confusion concerning the sexual and gender accessory. Though it is not proved that children of such parents get nonconventional orientation.
History ¹ 1
Maria has married in 20 years. Has given birth to two children. Strong on character, she always knew what live with the weak man cannot. After 13 years of home life she has expelled the husband. One fine day in a hairdressing salon where Maria works, girl Lilja was arranged. They have made friends. In due course relations became more and more frank.
- once, facing a mirror, I have caught myself on thought that it want to be pleasant to you, - admitted as - that Lilja.
Some months later women began to live together. Fellow workers consider as their close girlfriends. Daughters Maria - Bringing down and Olesya - have concerned it quite easy. Senior Maria admitted that loves women. And younger has guessed about all. Therefore in a family there were warm, friendly relations.
that you will not tell about parents Poured. They were categorically against its communication with Maria. Have taken away the daughter and long time interfered with their meetings. But women have stood. And 6 years live together. Even plan the joint child to get.
history ¹ 2
Alina since the childhood knew that it “ not such, as all “. In initial classes it liked girls. At teenage age it, having overcome itself, tried to be on friendly terms with boys. But it came to an end with anything. Looking through once again the newspaper, the girl has encountered the announcement: the woman will get acquainted with the girl for friendship. Alina, without hesitation, has written the letter. Correspondence lasted long four years. At last girls have exchanged phones and more some months called up. When Alina and Aselja have understood what more live the friend without the friend cannot, they have met. Here already there is more than half a year of the lady do not leave. Parents of girls what do not guess. They, as well as all associates, consider as their friends.
- I very much like thy girlfriend, - Alina`s mum more often speaks to the daughter.
and girls want to get in the meantime the child. But as it to carry out …
- Alina will Give birth, - has told to me Aselja. - But I am jealous it not only of women, but also to muzhiks too. Therefore the traditional way does not approach us. Probably, we will make artificial insemination.
a joke in a subject
In a bar the muzhik approaches to the girl.
- At the wrong door, road, I the lesbian!
- and what such the lesbian?
- you see that girl? And so I want it!
- Hm, means, I too the lesbian!