Maria Gorodova: the Youth is considered the most dangerous period of life
“ I was amazed with that the majority of arrested persons during unapproved meetings - teenagers... “ Alina.
Hello, Alina. The church always considered a youth as the most dangerous period of human life. Tsar David, sacred and the prophet, appealed to the Lord: “ Sins of my youth and my crimes do not remember; on Your favour... “ and sacred just Iov, a minute of despair, and at all reproached God: “ You... You make to me sins of my youth... - you pursue on traces of my feet “.
Absorbed by crowd
In modern psychology the section studying pubertat - age of puberty - one of the most difficult. To understand this “ secret of secrets “ - the teenager - psychologists involve the advanced achievements of physiology, endokrinologii, sexology, genetics, sociology... And even linguistics and mathematical modelling. Sometimes young men, outgrowing age of dangerous errors, leave to us a witnessing occurring.
For example, such:
“ those days when to me were new
All vpechatlenja lives -
Both looks of maidens, and noise dubrovy,
And at night pene a nightingale, -
When raised feelings
Freedom, glory and love
And inspired arts
So strongly stirred blood, -
Hours of hopes and pleasures
Melancholy sudden osenja,
Then any spiteful genius
Began to visit secretly me “.
Or here the such:
“ Feet carry away
my hands and a trunk,
And the head goes trace.
As if from a hang-over,
I walk along the street,
the Brain is overflowed
by confusion and delirium.
All say that is necessary
someone to me to become,
And I would like to remain myself.
To me it became difficult now
simply to become angry.
And I go, absorbed by crowd “.
And Victor Tsoy singing about a head which follows feet and hands, is not less exact, than Alexander Sergeevich in the description of the demon poisoning with the spiteful poison a pure soul of a youth.
Strangely enough, a fair witnessing of that is created in young creation, for all history of mankind it is left not too much. On - visible to us to forget the demons overwhelming us in young years easier, than, being burnt with shame, to remember that we then have done or only could make...
“ My God, I sinned... “
And all - taki the confessions, extremely frankly telling that occurs at this age to soul and a body, are. We will get a grasp of one of them. It is valuable not only the event analysis in the young man, but also that ruthlessly estimates the world into which it enters. The world absolutely not not disturbed by to save and protect entering in it. So, blissful Avrely Avgustin. “ the Confession “.
Here about school and about hypocrisy of adults: “ Me also have sent to school to study in the reading and writing. On the trouble I did not understand, what advantage in it but if it was lazy me beat... I, My God, did not have a lack neither of memory, nor of abilities with which You have wished to allocate me, but I liked to play, and for it I was punished by those who were engaged, understands sja, the same. Entertainments of adults name sja business, at children they too business, but adults for them punish. The instructor, biv shy me, occupied sja not with the same, than I? If it was won by a scientific colleague, unless he was smothered less by bile and envy, than me when on competitions in a ball top it took necessary me a companion on game?.
My God My God, I sinned. I amused the hearing false fairy tales which only kindled ljubo pytstvo, and me set on more and more to look own eyes at shows, games of seniors (gladiatorial games and jumps which suited the higher city city councils. - M. G) . Those who suits them, have so a high office that almost all wish it for the children and at the same time willingly suppose, that them sekli if these shows disturb to their doctrine; parents want, that the doctrine has given the chance to children ustrai vat the same shows “.
And here about to what learnt teenagers of Ancient Rome: “ Look, My God, as tshchatel but sons observe human rules, kasa ju shchiesja letters and syllables, poluchenye them from masters of speech and as prene bregajut they from You it is received nymi by immutable rules of eternal rescue... When the person in a pursuit of glory of the orator, is surrounded nyj by crowd of people, it pursues in brutal hatred of the enemy, in every possible way osteregaet sja obmolvki “ among ljudev “ and at all osterezhet sja in the fury to clean the person. Really ljubo j the enemy can appear more dangerously, than the hatred storming against this enemy? Whether it is possible, pursuing another, to ruin it more terribly, than enmity ruins own heart?
Here on a threshold of what life I found sja, unfortunate, and here on what arena I exercised sja. It was more terrible to me to admit varvarizm, than osterechsja with envy to those who has not admitted it...
As I was merzok then even if to these people delivered displeasure, deceiving both the tutor, and teachers, and parents for the love of entertainments, from desire to look at an empty show, from cheerful and uneasy obezjannichanja. Unless I did not do by another what to test at all did not want.? And if me convicted and scolded, I grew furious.
Also it is children`s innocence? No, My God, no! Allow me to tell it, My God. All it is identical: in the life beginning - tutors, teachers, nuts, balls, sparrows; When the person became adults - prefects, tsars, gold, estates, slaves - in effect all this same, only a ruler replace severe punishments “.
flesh Call. “ at sixteen-year age, having interrupted on house circumstances school studies, I lived together with parents at a leisure, doing nothing, and the prickly thicket of my lusts has expanded above my head; there was no hand vykorchevat it. On the contrary, when my father has seen in a bath that I reach manhood that I already in clothes of youthful alarm, it have joyfully informed on it to mother as if already dreamt of the future grandsons, rejoicing to intoxication in which this world forgets You, Founder, and instead of You loves Your creation, revelling in invisible wine of the perverted will tending downwards.
... The fog rose from a bog of carnal desires and in full swing maturity, obscured and dulled my heart, and for mgloju lusts clear light of attachment any more did not differ... Who would order my grief, would turn to me on advantage an escaping charm of any novelty, would put a limit to my hobbies? Let about coast of matrimonial life the storm of my age and if there can not be in it a rest would break, I let would be satisfied with a birth of children, according to instructions of your law, My God!. My relatives have not taken care to pick up me falling, and ozhenit; them worried only that I was learnt as it is possible to speak and convince is better the speech. Who did not extol then praises of my terrestrial father that it was spent for the son over the means, giving it even possibility far to leave for the sake of the doctrine. And at the same time this father did not pay any attention what I grow before You and whether I stay in chastity, - if only only in eloquence I have been glorified “.
About mother, contemporaries, the civil wife: “ Mother washing wanted, that I did not whore, and especially was afraid of communication with the married woman, - I remember, with what anxiety she persuaded me alone. But I headlong slid downwards, blinded so that it was a shame to me before contemporaries of the small perversity. I listened to their boasting by the crimes; the they were merzee, the more they bragged of themselves. And it was pleasant to whore to me not only for the love of libertinism, but also from vanity. Being afraid of censure, I became porochnee and if there was no offence in which I could be compared to other villains I composed that I make what I actually did not do if only me did not despise for my innocence “.
Larceny: “ In the neighbourhood with our vineyard there was a pear burdened by fruits, absolutely not seductive... Unusable boys, we have gone otrjasti it and to take away the extraction in deaf midnight; On pernicious custom our street entertainments were tightened till this time. We have carried away therefrom a huge burden not for meal to ourselves; and we were ready to throw out it though to pigs if only to make an act which that was pleasant that was zapreten. Here my heart, My God, here my heart on which You have taken pity when it was at the bottom of a chasm. To You now my heart let will tell, what for it searched to be malicious without any purpose. My perversity was the reason of my perversity after all only. It was disgusting, and I loved it; I loved death; I loved the falling...
That I have taken, unfortunate, from this, remembering what, I now redden, especially from this larceny in which to me there was lovely larceny and anything else? How much I remember my condition of the spirit of that time, one I in any way would not make it. Hence, I loved here still community of with whom stole. About, enemy friendship, imperceptible debauchery of mind, thirst to harm on laughter and in an entertainment! The aspiration to another`s loss without a pursuit of own benefit, and is simple because speak: “ we will go, we will make “ also it is a shame not to be shameless! “
About forums and seducers: “ Pulled me to itself and those employment which were considered as the respectable: I dreamt of a forum with its lawsuits where I would shine, and me would shower with praises that more than more skilfully I lay. I was the first in ritorskoj to school: it was full of pride pleasure and dut arrogance. But, My God, You know it, I did not accept any participation in “ oprokidyvanijah “ with which were engaged “ seducers “ (this ominous devil name was as though a refinement sign). It was impudent prosecution of fair beginners which they forced down from a direct way, so, for fun, in saturation of the spiteful pleasure. There is no the act more assimilating to acts devil “...
without a prayer
“ I have late fallen in love with You! - With a pain the sacred exclaims! - here You were in me, and I - was in external and there searched for You... And you have stretched Your hand from height and “ has taken my soul “ from this deep gloom, when my mother... Mourned over me before You more than mourn mothers of died children “.
you Read the book of these long searches of God, the book written 16 centuries ago, and you understand that soul movements in this time have not changed. Just as entertainments of teenagers, and the sins burning them of soul have not changed. Perhaps only the pain of today`s mothers on the stray children not always remembers about a prayer how remembered it mother of sacred Avgustina.
Well, and the world, the world to which in our children go, it too has changed. As the American psychologist Filip Rice writes, the average modern child by 14 years has already seen on a TV screen of 18 000 murders.
Dear readers! We wait for your responses to Maria Gorodovoj`s publications. The address: Truth street, d. 24, Moscow, 125993, Edition.
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